It was like switching from Daylight Savings Time.....only not.

Today is mom's surgery which meant I had childcare duties in full force on my own this morning. Since Madyson's bus comes at 6:30, they usually wake up around 5:45.

Being the planner that I am, I had the whole strategy outlined before I closed my eyes last night. I would wake up around 5:15ish, take my shower and then start getting everyone up and ready. The plan was going wonderfully. I had taken my shower and applied my makeup.

I feel I need to explain now that these kids are more sluggish in the morning than I am.....and well, that's BAD. VERY BAD. They insisted it was NOT time to wake up. All the while, I was pulling covers back and pulling their feet to the floor leading them to the kitchen for breakfast while Luke continued to ask "Is it nighttime?"

Because I channeled my inner June Cleaver (insert sarcasm), they had a nutritious breakfast consisting of Fruity Pebbles......which reminds me that we forgot to take our Flintstones vitamins this morning....oops.

Anyway, hair was brushed (or spiked for Luke), teeth were brushed, clothes were worn and shoes were put on feet.....and with 10 minutes to spare thank you very much. This gave me time to dry my hair.

6:30....Time for the bus. No bus.

6:45.....Still no bus.

7:00.....Guess what? Still no bus.

GREAT!!! Frantic rush to finish getting dressed and brushing my own teeth.

7:10....I begin gathering lunches, snacks and backpacks and rushing to the car to move stuff around and loading up to take Madyson to school myself.

7:12....I walk back through the kitchen door to notice the time on the coffee pot......6:12.

Yeah, that's right. We were up and at 'em a whole hour early. Did you hear that? An HOUR early!!! I cannot stress how important sleep is to me. It is what I love to do most. It is essential to my functioning throughout the day and I just lost a whole hour of it.

This may also explain why it was still dark when we were waiting on the school bus. I'm not sure, but it's just a theory.

Apparently after our lights went off yesterday during a storm, I reset the clock a whole hour later. No, I still don't know how that happened. Perhaps I should have caught the bus with Madyson and repeated the first grade to, you know, learn how to tell time and all.

Looking at the big picture, I really may not be the best person to leave your child with.....you know with all the unhealthy breakfast and not taking vitamins and all.....

......but they'll be on time!

Are you smarter than a four year old?

This morning while we were waiting on the teachers to show up for preschool Luke and I had a conversation of the type I LIVE for. There is nothing more fun than to hear a little kid's perspective on things of life.

This was our conversation.....complete with the speech exactly the way he would say it.

Luke: Hey Nunni. We planted punkins yestaday.

Me: REALLY? That's really neat.

Luke: Yep. We're gonna paint them. But first they have to turn gween and yewow and owange.

Me: Wow. That sounds like fun. Are you excited about watching them turn colors? (Not sure if that is true or not and totally embarrassed that the four year old knows more about something than I do.)

Luke: Yep.

Me: So what else happened yesterday? What was the Bible story about?

Luke: About some guy that got beat up.

Me: (Searching my head for a Bible story that could match "some guy got beat up".) Was it David and Goliath?

Luke: Uh no. (Looking at me like THE dumbest person ever.)

Me: Well, who then?

Luke: They threw him in the ditch.

Me: The Good Samaritan?

Luke: Uh.....Yeah (Still looking at me like I should have got that 10 minutes ago.)

Me: Oh look.....your teacher just pulled up.

In my defense it was before 8:00 a.m. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some studying I need to do.

La La La La...Elmo's World....

Saturday our house was transformed into Elmo's World. Frankly, Elmo's world isn't that appealing to me. I mean, have you heard the song? "Elmo loves his goldfish, his crayon too....That's Elmo's world!!"

Finally I have found someone who has a sadder world than me. Boy, imagine if all you had to look forward to was a goldfish and A crayon. He doesn't even have a whole box of crayons....poor guy.

But, as sad as Elmo's world is, we still celebrated with the furry little monster for this little monster:

Anyway, to say I was challenged is an understatement. I still had not fully recovered from the surgery, so the cake wasn't one of my finer moments. The fondant just didn't happen as planned. After the icing....I was pooped.




It is so much fun to see the difference from the first and second birthday. They don't get the whole, blow the candle out thing, but he blew his candle out about 6 times. I guess that means he's twelve???

Of course, what's an Elmo party without Elmo presents?

He now has the furry Elmo hands. Sunday morning I opened my bedroom door and a flash of red hands went blurring by. He also received an Elmo see'n'say with shapes, a new bike and some clothes.

I also have to mention the worst gift I've ever bought. I bought him a new jacket and a pair of shoes. However, Ben, is not a fan of shoes. AT ALL.

This is where I broke a vow I made 6 1/2 years ago when Madyson was born. I swore then I would NEVER.....NEVER.....purchase character shoes. Three kids later....I broke the vow.

Look at our new shoes that we love and refuse to take off!

It was such a fun day. I love celebrating each of their birthday's and showing them just how special they are to me and to our whole family.

Fun was had by all.

But before I end this post, I have to show you the coolest thing I found at Party City. They had balloons with names on them. Of course, I had to buy them. How cute are they???

Dear Bejamin

Dear Bejamin,

Today you are two years old. That's unbelievable. You should still be that enormous baby the nurses brought out. I still remember them unrolling your from your blanket and we all gasped. You were HUGE! HUGE! You had little rolls all over....but you were the cutest little thing. Who would have known that little 8 lb 0.5 oz baby would have brought so much excitement? And excitement it has been.....along with some mischief, wild antics and just plain craziness.

To put it simply...you're wild. You walk in the room and you let it be known that you are present. I wonder where you get that from? ;-) I worried when you were born that the bond Madyson and Luke had with each other would make you vulnerable to their plots against you. HA! They run in fear of you. You take nothing from no one. I think you're still getting even from all the pokes and prods you received from your first meeting with them.

You are without a doubt the funniest little kid I've ever known. You make me laugh daily. For that, I'm so grateful you are in my life. You're also bossy and impatient. If you didn't have that little finger to point, I'm not sure you could talk.

It breaks my heart sometimes to think that you're the last of the babies.....and today you're no longer a baby. You're a toddler. Even though it's sad that you're not a baby, I'm excited to see the little boy you are becoming. I love you more each and every day.

I love you Buford!

Love,
Nunni

It all started when.....

< So I know I've been noticeably absent from the blog for a little while now. I've had a perfectly good reason though. A little thing called life. I honestly have no idea how to even approach the task of catching up on all that has happened. I know this will become known as the longest post ever written on a blog....ever. I suggest a bathroom break and grabbing a snack right now. So the main reason I was absent was I had a minor surgery last Tuesday. I knew the whole experience would be blog worthy after the 3 hours I spent doing all the pre-op stuff on the Friday before.

I walked into a room FULL of people (and not a one of them under 65 I will add) and sat down in the only empty chair in the room. Luckily, it was next to an irate, profanity screaming lady who liked to talk to herself. I'm no expert, but I've watched a lot of Dr. Phil and my diagnosis was turrets. She explained to the whole room that she had only stopped in there for directions and now she has to wait all day to see someone. Um, yeah, because when I need directions, the first place I go is to the pre-op of a hospital.

I was finally called back to a cubicle to talk about all my business with a lady, and let's be honest, everyone else in the surrounding cubicles. This made me ask "Whatever happened to patient confidentiality?" Luckily, they were trying out a new computer system which made the whole process last twelve and a half times longer than it would have normally lasted. All of the documents are now signed on the computer and the lady was impressed beyond words how well I had signed. She said I had signed better than anyone else had. It probably has something to do with the fact that I've signed my name on a credit card or twelve or it could be that all of the other people that had been at her desk were 106 and probably don't have the most steady hands in the world.

I was then sent back into the waiting room to wait for one of about 4 old men to usher me to the room where I knew torture awaited.......the blood work.

Little did I know, the actual torture would take place on the walk to the lab. Not only did my little old man usher me to the lab, but he also had another couple to walk there. Grandpa, bless his heart, couldn't keep up and I'm pretty sure I had my 26th birthday during the time it took us to walk down the hall. During the walk the lady asked our "leader" what she was having done. I couldn't help but think this was something you should know BEFORE you got there. He informed her she was having a mammogram. It was then I knew I had to make sure he delivered the right paperwork to the nurse in the lab. As much as I was dreading the blood work that awaited me, I knew I had NO desire to endure a mammogram.

After arriving the in the lab I completed yet another form that included all of the same questions I had just answered. This sparked another question. If everything is on computers, why am I answering the same thing over and over and over again?

I endured the weigh in. She started in the 120s. I went ahead and helped her out by just moving the scale to the other end and telling her she shouldn't waste her time.

I was then lectured on the need for me not to wear make-up or deodorant the day of my surgery. Um, what? She also seemed to have questions about every other area of my body except the area being operated on. After asking a very personal question about that area, and the nurse not having an answer I had to ask her if she could please read my paperwork to me so I could be assured that they did indeed know what end of my body was being operated on.

To cut to the final chase of that horrible, never ending day....yes, the blood work was miserable and painful and I sported a bruise on my arm for a week and a half. Also, there is no feeling like walking down the hall of a hospital with a cup of your own urine. Yeah, I was sufficiently grossed out.

I cannot go on to the day of the surgery without sharing a very inadequate pic of the most awesome gift basket ever! I've said it many times, but I have to say it again.....I have the most amazing friends. This basket was totally full of the best books, magazines, snacks, lotion and other goodies ever.....including the BEST gingersnap cookies on the planet made by Kerrie. I'm so bummed I didn't get a better pic of it.

Thanks Tammy, Kerrie, Bryan and Crissy!!!

Fast forward to the day of the surgery. I was weepy. Not entirely because of the surgery though. I was missing Madyson's first day of First Grade. We have a First Grader now. I was so upset I was missing a milestone. Let's face it, I'm the milestone queen. I'm there for them all and have the pictures to prove it. Even though I wasn't there, I still have the pictures from the morning.

In case you're wondering about the shoe picture, those are Twinkle Toes by Skechers. We, I mean I with Madyson constantly nagging me, searched high and low looking for those shoes in her size and without a skull, thank you very much. These are actually some cute shoes in person. The tongues are hot pink and black zebra print....how cute is that?!?! I'm so relieved because I think she's going to have my sense of style.

So while Madyson was going to first grade, I was laying in a hospital bed with nothing between me and the seemingly 50 other people in pre-op but a hospital gown and curtain. Yeah, it was pleasant.....Especially the moment that I had to be assisted to the bathroom to keep my backside covered by a blanket and to have my iv carried. Call me difficult and high maintenance, but I like to take care of my business ALONE.

My very kind pastor showed up and I can't express the comfort he and my grandmother provided while talking about death and planning funerals while sitting on either side of me before I went into SURGERY. I know it was a minor procedure and all, but you know it wasn't really the topic of conversation I would have chosen for the moment. It actually provided some comic relief for the moment though when I expressed my thoughts on their distasteful conversation.

Waking up from surgery is no fun. My first memories were of the nurse sitting with me listing my bandages and other "stuff" to someone on the phone. Although I could never pick her out of a lineup, she was my favorite nurse. She took the goofy hat off of me they made me wear into surgery and fixed my hair....because even though I just came out of surgery and at the moment I did NOT care, I am eternally grateful now. She also gave me ice, which doesn't sound like much, but since I had not had anything since midnight, the ice was good.

After leaving recovery, the next nurse was not so much of a favorite. She told me I had to go to the bathroom to be discharged. Well ok, that wouldn't be so much of a problem if I was certain I could feel my legs and you know, walk. I declined her offer to leave and went back to sleep. I was awakened every few minutes by my "helpful" grandmother who continued to feed me ice and nearly choked me to death. I finally made it out of the bed and into my clothes and was discharged.....but not after asking me to sign something. Um, yeah....I don't know what I signed, but I'm pretty sure my signature looked something like the infamous Michael Jackson signature on this document. For all I know I signed away my first born and my first born's first born.

That night we had a pretty bad storm and lightening struck our satellite. I don't have to tell you what a horrible thing that was. Especially since it happened on Tuesday and they weren't sending anyone until Saturday. Luckily, three of the four boxes were hit and the one that wasn't was mine. Hey, I had just had surgery.....maybe God just felt like cutting me a break that day. It still presented a problem because while I could watch all my night shows, what was I going to do during the day while I was sitting in the recliner in the living room? I'll tell you what....I had a Reba marathon. I knew having all the seasons on DVD would pay off. I do feel like I need to insert here that if you are in pain, watching a funny show isn't always a good thing. Oh the pain.

And finally......We have a preschooler now. That's right. Luke is a big boy now. I can't even begin to express how hard it is to leave him every morning. He's always been the "baby" of the three and it's just hard leaving him. I am very relieved though that he loves it and gladly stays when I drop him off every morning.

You didn't think I wouldn't have pics of his first day did you?

We know nothing about nothing.

One of the kids' favorite things to do is look at a picture album I have that has pictures of all their births.....nothing too graphic mind you. Madyson and Luke were looking in it a couple days ago and it sparked one of the funniest conversations I've heard in a while.

Madyson: What is that stuff on me? Is it lotion?

Jessica (her mom): Um, no.

Madyson: Well, what is it then?

Jessica: Um, I don't know.

Madyson: Mammie what is it?

My mom: Ask your mom.

Madyson: Nunni, what is it?

Me: Blank stare.....

Madyson: Good grief! Well, somebody HAS to know what it is!

I'm sure we've now left her with the feeling that no one in her family knows anything about anything....especially her birth.

I'll start saving now for the therapy bill.